I can explain but I cannot excuse. The consequences of my actions must be accepted. All that is left is to say sorry and to ensure that my failure does not define me but enables growth towards something better. This weakness of mind cannot go on. I must start to understand my own truth, without it I am nothing. Words should become more than just words, they should be my foundation stones, my guiding principles, my truth. I see the pain, anger and frustration lying in wait for my children. I know what this will mean for them and those they will love. This is the hardest of all the consequences as they are innocent but will suffer all the same. My own pain is merely penance and is often welcomed as an old friend. I see you looking down at me and I sense your shame. Please look away, there are others more worthy of the sadness in your soul. I feel your anger across the room and I wish it was love. Please don’t waste time on me, there are others who earn your love everyday. I am tired now, sleep is opening its arms for me. Tonight I pray that it will not judge and just let me be. Just let me be.